Companies of all sizes have become more familiar with “mental health,” and post-covid research has shown that “connectedness” is a key driver of high-performing companies.

Despite that knowlege, workplace loneliness is proving to be a confounding problem.

After reading the recent article, “We’re Still Lonely at Work,” from the Harvard Business Review, I had one large takeaway: we need to take more breaks, and find casual & consistent ways to connect with fellow employees (of all levels of hierarchy).

While I’m not in favor of smoking, it sounds like the smoke break checks all the boxes. But, assuming you find that re-instituting the smoke break is a horrible, no-good, really-bad idea, read on for some alternative solutions.

But first, how did we get here?…

Our Epidemic of Loneliness & Isolation

In 2023, US Surgeon General, Vivek Murphy, published the wave-making report, “Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation.” He outlined in detail the ways that our society has become isolated, and that “Lacking social connection is as dangerous as smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day.”

The report also compiles many independent studies that show that poor social relationships (meaning isolation, lack of social support, or loneliness) were associated with:

29% increase in the risk of heart disease (p 26)
32% increase in the risk of stroke (p 26)
increased risk for the development of type 2 diabetes (p 27)
increase the risk of developing dementia by approximately 50% in older adults

In short, it’s pretty damning against loneliness. She is not well liked.

lacking social connection is as dangerous as smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day

Workplace Isolation

In 2023, the Surgeon General also released reports specifically targeting loneliness at the workplace. Recently, the Harvard Business Review reminded us “We’re Still Lonely at Work,” and outlined some myths.

No, loneliness won’t be solved by making everyone all go back into the office.
No, loneliness won’t be cured by tossing employees “on a team”
No, loneliness won’t be fixed by one person working on it alone (ie, it’s not a “personal problem”)

Just like any aspect of workplace culture, there needs to be organizational support from your company in order to defeat loneliness.

How to Stop Loneliness at Work

The article from HBR outlines 7 steps to stop loneliness at work. But that’s a little too much, and I don’t want to plagerize. Knowing what I’ve learned from working with companies, and reading HBR and the Surgeon General’s workplace wellness tools, I’ve compiled into three easy steps.

1 - Become aware of your company culture

Before you can heal, you have to become aware. (You can’t fix a tummy ache if you don’t know what upset it in the first place.) It’s no different with company culture.

The authors of the HBR article outline have a free loneliness tool for you to consider your own loneliness at work, and learn how to ask about it with your employees.

Choose a few of your employees (3-5) that you trust to give you a straight answer. Do they feel like they can rely on people at work? Do feel that they can be honest at work with what’s going on in their life? How have other employees been there for them? Or in general, do they feel that they’ve created genuine connections at work?

If you don’t have 3-5 employees that you trust to give you an honest answer… then I think you have some work to do.

2 - Loosen the work schedule

Busyness is it’s own problem. You can begin to combat it by building unscheduled time into your employees day. Loosen the edges a bit.

This is harder than it seems. Teams are still short-staffed and the customer demands are high. Creating more time for your team might mean asking your clients and customers for longer deadlines or slower service, which may seem like an impasse.

A fun example? One of my clients has the tongue-and-cheek “mandatory fun” events.

I urge you to find new ways that make sense for your company.

3 - Create a culture of connection

This is the hardest of all. You can’t force people connect with one another, you can only create the opportunity to do so.

Once you’ve become aware of your culture gaps, and loosened up the schedule, its time to encourage connection and it starts with you.

Find small, consistent moments with your team to ask about their day and share something about your life. Then, you can begin to ask about their life, or maybe they’ll offer something freely. Start with the easy ones, like whether you have pets, what are their names, or… Are you more of a fall/winter person? Or… Do you love the heat and summertime? Oh, THAT’S why you must hate it when Joey turns the AC way way down…

Building trust through small everyday actions

If you’re thinking, “there’s no way that talking about the AC will help build a company culture of connection & trust, and thus reduce employee loneliness…” I’d argue otherwise, and lots of data and the Surgeon General agrees with me.

“Leaders can build trust through small, everyday interactions, for example, by modeling and inviting others to share small moments of their life with them.” - US Department of Health & Human Services, Workplace Mental Health & Wellbeing https://www.hhs.gov/surgeongeneral/priorities/workplace-well-being/index.html

But wait - what if you have a “toxic” company culture? Then these recommendations will not work. We’re human, we’re not going to share anything about ourselves if we do not feel safe socially.

Employees who feel connected perform better.

If you’re in a company that doesn’t feel connected, you likely have that icky feeling of a gut instinct. If you’d like some help convincing yourself (or your boss) that it’s worth working on…

“Decades of research demonstrate that when people feel psychologically fulfilled, they tend to be healthier, happier, and more productive.” From the Harvard Business Review titled, “5 Things High Performing Teams do Differently.”

And what are those 5 Things? “The authors present five key characteristics of high-performing teams, all of which highlight the vital role of close connection among colleagues as a driver of team performance.”

You got this!

Does this ring too close to home?

Don’t worry, it happens to all good organizations at some point. Sometimes it helps to have an outside facilitator ask the hard questions and unpack the root of the problem.

If you’d like to brainstorm or shuffle up your company culture, Shoot us a message.

Email Us

References:

Constance Noonan Hadley and Sarah L. Wright. Harvard Business Review, Issue Nov-Dec 2024: https://hbr.org/2024/11/were-still-lonely-at-work

Vivek Murphy. “Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation.” Report from the office of the US Surgeon General. 2023 https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/surgeon-general-social-connection-advisory.pdf

Rob Friedman. “5 Things High Performing Teams Do Differently.” Harvard Business Review. Online: October 1, 2021 https://hbr.org/2021/10/5-things-high-performing-teams-do-differently

How to defeat employee loneliness and create a culture of connection.